Artist in Residence

I believe as you get older, it becomes easier to spot some of your formative life experiences. For me, my first Artist in Residence experience fits that category.

Artists in Residence at Chateau d’Orquevaux, February 2023.

I applied to the Chateau d'Orquevaux Artist in Residence last spring, 2022. I had never attended a residency program before, let alone one involving me being out of the country, on my own, for an entire month. However, if out of the country meant France, then, yeah, I'm going to apply for the hell of it.

I was notified of my acceptance to the program a few months later and had a spot picked out for February 2023 as one of their Emerging Artist grant recipients. I was so ecstatic that I began to think of all of the reasons why this wasn't legit and had to be a scam. They did say only 20% of applicants are accepted after all, and there was no way I would hold up against those odds, right?

Once I found out I was pregnant that Fall, I began to think about not attending. It's easy to find a hundred made-up reasons not to do something; it's harder to find those authentic and affirming reasons to do it. With the support of my Husband, family, and friends, we bought the plane ticket, and I began to anxiously plan out how to truck all of my bulky materials to another continent.

February approached rapidly, as did my giant baby bump and need for unlimited naps. As I got stuck into the residency, it turned out the program was all it stated and more so. I entered full of self-doubt, imposter syndrome, and a penchant for comparison and left with confidence, self-trust, and an entirely new creative family to call my own. Not to mention an even bigger belly fed daily by fresh croissant deliveries.

Going into the month-long adventure, my goal was to create whatever I wanted without worrying about what would make sales, how it would work for commissions, or anything related to what others thought about it. I wanted to create new work and understand WHY it looked the way it looked and WHAT that meant.

With the unlimited art time Chateau Orquevaux and its staff provided me and the wisdom and guidance of my beloved fellow residents, I came home with a deeper understanding of my artistic practice and its trajectory.

I realized my work sits deeply rooted in my femininity and desired strength; it pushes past boundaries and self-limiting beliefs to create otherworldly forms that whisper and shout, "I can be bold and soft. I can be expansive and delicate. I can hold a multitude of moments and venture into the unknown."

From here, I continue to create with this newfound knowledge that was always somewhere in me and my work. I take that and prepare to enter a new unknown world of motherhood, where I will find an anchor in my family, friends, and art.

My time during my residency changed me in so many beautiful ways. I will be able to pinpoint that month in time until I leave this planet, and I will be forever in love and grateful to the group of humans I met there who were so open and loving.